As is the often the case, the simple act of regularly gathering with others creates camaraderie, reassurance, fun and a deep knowing- bearing witness to someone’s life over a span of time.

Felicity Dunn’s playgroup story was as natural and organic as they come- and it is still part of her life, 16 years on.

In Thornbury, in early 2009 the maternal child health nurse said, “Now, you go, and keep meeting somewhere (else, not here).”

One mother organised a venue, which happened to be a yoga studio. One of the mums was a yoga teacher. Felicity, along with a few other playgroup Mums, learnt yoga from her “each precious Saturday morning,” while her husband looked after their baby.

As the children started to move, they outgrew the yoga studio and found a community hall for their playgroup. They continued to meet there every Tuesday afternoon, for years.

“We got into a pattern where we took turns making a big pasta bake or something, so the children could have an early dinner (and so could parents, if there were leftovers), and it was a lot of fun. By then, some mums had returned to work and dads had gone part-time, and so it usually was mums and dads at playgroup. Often a parent who finished work early joined us at the playgroup, so we'd have the whole family.”

The venue had an outdoor area and some toys which the group brought out. Often, they would set up a craft activity, have a snack and as Felicity recalls: “There was always an opportunity to share a recipe idea or have a good solid whinge about babies not sleeping!” 

Felicity has an early memory of the babies all sitting up on their bottoms.

“I thought, ‘I wonder if my son can do that’, so I tried it, and he could! All that time and I hadn't thought to see if he could sit up! The poor bugger!”

While at playgroup, the parents could gather a sense of knowledge, while learning through the joy of play. In the way that children, and indeed adults, bloom and develop at different times, the parents were invested in nurturing their little ones’ growth but in a natural, easy going way. In the critical early stages of development, the playgroup acted as a steady guide, encouraging new ways to try different skills and share experiences.

“It was always chaotic but in a fun way, and we marvelled at how quickly our babies grew and how quickly we had to adapt to the next phase. It was so valuable to be able to discuss this with other parents going through the same or similar thing. I looked forward to playgroup each week, in fact, it was a bit of a lifeline at times, as the transition to being a parent could be lonely...I was the first of my other friends to have a baby, and they were still all working full-time.”

A member of the group had learned about a points system to share the load, an idea passed on from a mother of an older generation. Each parent started with 20 points. The points were used if someone minded their child, while the baby-sitter gained points. This give and take made it easy for each parent to ask for help or support when needed because everyone knew that they would give back when they could. One parent was the ‘Points Treasurer’ and aided the kind exchange. “This system allowed for many nights out,” said Felicity.

Time trundled on, new families and new babies joined the playgroup, and the playgroup roots held.

“I'm still friends with the parents from my playgroup, 15 years later. We've been on camping trips, dinners, excursions and adventures. I made friends. My husband made friends and my kids made friends. Some of the times the families in our group had some hard times, serious illnesses, job loss etc. We helped each other. Some made massive career steps and had other parents in our group to support them on the pathway to further training because they worked in similar fields.” 

Felicity has served as part of the Playgroup Victoria board for 10 years, eight as chair. She is now the Chair of the Playgroup Australia National Board.

Felicity lives in regional Victoria, in the goldmining town of Ballarat. The thing that stands out about Felicity, and her life working in the early years sector in varying roles, is her belief in grassroots, community connections. There is no pretence about Felicity. She is always ready to welcome others. To share a story. To contribute and pitch in. She has been a great role model for others over the years.

Her own playgroup experience has led her to create further opportunities for others. What started naturally and organically, continues to produce harvest due to the care and the reliability, of returning to where it all began.

“How good that the sheer coincidence of having a baby in a place at a similar time to other people in the same place could lead to such lifelong friendships, and so much more!”

Find a local playgroup here

Article by Sinead Halliday